Friday, December 29, 2017

Changing into a new Person

This year has been a year of self realisation. There has been a lot of talking to self and loads of self evaluation.

Consider this, morally there are duties which you have to execute and then there is only you.
10000 things you are supposed to achieve of which you achieve, say, 9900, but then you missed on those last 100.  You start feeling terrible. You keep blaming yourself.  The people around you are constantly making you realise how inefficient you are in handling things. You  start believing it and add to your already existing guilt.

360 days of conscious efforts, everyday a question to yourself. What is my priority today? What is that I want to achieve? Decide, act on it, deny and say no to others, achieve your targets and then you feel accomplished.

This year I have been able to improve myself on the following:

  • Deciding for myself, 
  • Being firm on my priorities 
  • Ignoring stupid comments
  • Appreciating genuine concerns but not be affected
  • Accepting facts 
  • Not tolerating injustice 
  • Standing for self and especially for the family
  • Not bothering to justify yourself 
  • Being true and deliver
  • The Art of communicating loud and clear
  • Being Firm
I have achieved a lot in terms of 
  • Completing Times Women Rally from Mumbai to Goa- 
    • Thus being A Guinness World Record Holder
  • Choreographing more than 7 performances at different occasions
  • Bonding with my daughters
  • Renovating my House
  • Reading 12 Books
  • Feeling proud of designs and solutions provided at office. 
  • Building a strong team of achievers at office.
  • Completing Marathons
  • Happiness of My younger daughter's Marathon
  • Proud of my elder Daughters strong determination. 
All these could not have been achieved without the strong support of my wonderful husband and loving father.

Monday, September 7, 2015

First Moms Club


First Moms Club is  a group of 30000+ Amazing Moms created by Ruchita Dhar Shah...
The group is one great joint family... A Superrrrrr Ladies Special Family with their own personal extensions...
I never realised when I became a part of this extended family...
As in any families there are individuals with different opinions...
And they strongly put them so....

It is an eventful place where People

  • Share their Happiness
  • Vent their anger
  • Crib about their daily problems
  • Discuss Health issues
  • Express their sorrows
  • Support like pillars... 
  • Fight like cats.... 
  • Ask for Advices... 


You get the best advices.. Stupid recommendations... Honest opinions...   :)

Here you have  the most Confused beings... Loving mummas.. Insensitive women...   Ambitious ladies.... Selfless and amazing SAHM...  Counsellors.. Would be Mummas... New Mommas... Experienced Mummas...  Traditional Mummas.. New Age Mummas..


  • Mummas for the first time.. Mummas for the Nth time.. 
  • Mummas who are single parents... Mummas who are in joint families... 
  • Mummas of babies... toddlers.. teens...  Grownups.. Adults.. 
  • Mummas who have tummy babies.. 
  • Mummmas who have heart babies... 
  • Mummas who have special babies... 
  • Mummas doing multitasking..  
  • Mummas who are specialized in being just Mummas and doing an amazing job... 
  • Mummas who are NAUGHTY.. 
  • Mummas who are caring... 
  • Mummas who pray for you... 
  • Mummas who help you for absolutely nothing... 
  • Mummas who accompany each other at 3 am...
  • Mummas who make you realise you are not only one who has handled a stressful and an eventful day... 
  • Mummas who make you laugh when you just need it...  
  • Mummas who achieved a lot... 
  • Mummas who confess about the blunders they have committed while parenting and make you feel human and smile... 
  • Mummas who sometimes waste time asking stupid questions on the groupd while they should be actually acting....  
  • Mummas who became best friends here... and happy to meet in their own locality... 
  • Mummas who are support to other fella Mummas in a land of strangers...
  • Mummas working as a community...  
  • Mummas who are social citizens and good human at heart... 


All these are those women who have come up against all odds and doing a fantastic jobs...

Love you all.. and Thanks Ruchita Dhar Shah for creating this world of amazing MOMs.... 

Friday, August 28, 2015

I don't have a Sibling


I am the only child of my parents.  I don't have a sibling.. I don't have a brother or a sister.. So then with whom do I share the Bond of Love...

I have a set of superb cousins and am fortunate to have them in my life..

  • There is this cousin with whom I used to talk a lot when I was small..   I cried at his wedding for there was another person who was going to share the front seat with him even when I was there.. He was the one who taught me to ride luna.. scooter.. bike.. and yes even car...  I had bought 18 dresses for his wedding and my first lenses.....  I don't talk much to him any more.. But if I miss my mother he is the first person I wish to call.. but I don't..  
  • There is this cousin who met his lifepartner because of me...   They used to meet at my house and celebrate my birthdays alongwith my other relatives..  He is a person who indirectly taught me take the failures in stride and overcome and stand tall again.. He might not know but he influenced me in many ways..  His love for his wife has taught me the importance of the spouse and to love him unconditionally... He was the first person to know about my Husband and he told me to follow my heart and I shall never regret...    He induced in me the love of reading books and thirst for knowledge...
  • There is this cousin just beams with joy on seeing me... rushes to meet me and when I am handed-over to my lovely vahinis goes back to work..  He was the one who speaks less but his eyes does all the work...  I could not attend his wedding and I always feel bad about it...  He is the most noble person I have every met and good at the core..   He bought  a dress for me which I have still not disposed off.. It is 20 years old.... He has taught me to be good
  • There is this cousin who is very silent and my vahini does all the speaking... He loves me unconditionally and fatherly figure to me.... At times I am unable to keep in touch but he simply forgives me...  I can feel his love in the simple gestures that he bestows on me...  He ensured that the mundan of his eldest son was done at my house..  on Atya's lap...
  • There is this cousin who speaks less...  But I know he is hurt when I am sad... He is happy when I am happy.. I was broken when he was critically ill and then I realised who much I love him...  His daughters are as good soul as him...  I got the fancy for words from him.. He might not be aware that he has taught me so many things.. 


  • I have that cousin who has gone through hard times and I tried my best to help them...  He has lost the battle he was fighting but he is brave and am proud of him.. I pray that he finds happiness and GOD has something good for him..

  • I have my naughty lot of younger cousins who are a joy to be with... They just shower their  love on you and make me feel special.. They tease you.. teach you.. support you... Just be with you... entertain you... love you...  I love them all.. I love them all unconditionally.. I appreciate them when they achieve in life and scold them when I feel the need...  They make me realise how old I am and include my daughter in their cousin's group... 

I have fond memories of all cousins with whom I played.. With whom I fought.. Whose diapers I have changed... whom I taught to walk...   Who shared their affairs first with me...  Who troubled me to death...  I have memories of those distant cousins who are my best friends now...      

I have not sent any rakhis to any of them... But in every moment I remember you and this post is my way of conveying my love for you... 

Friday, July 31, 2015

Neutral Millennium Parenting

My last two posts on the occasion of "Father's Day" were on my Father and my Husband to acknowledge how amazing they are in playing their role as a "Father".

People often talk about equal rights, gender equality and being just. 

Another such term which is popular these days is Equal Parenting but I see a point of debate in it... I consciously use the term 'Neutral Parenting'...  

It means Parenting is not what we have to do in isolation or not always needs to be done together.... When you are a parent you are a parent for lifetime.... 

You cannot have father performing certain duties on particular days and a mother performing other duties on another and both together on remaining days..  

It is an art where each has his/her own style...  They should play the role as required naturally without classifying it as
  •  a mother's job or a father's job or 
  • it is his turn or it is her turn... 
It is just being parent....   be changing diapers or securing future of your child...  

It took me a while to differentiate the transformed Fathers & Mother or shall I call the "NEW AGE PARENT from the  traditional parents or shall I say the Fathers & Mothers of the gone era.. 

Here I have done analysis on the Neutral Parenting and NOT on the Parenting Styles which is a separate topic of research... 

The core engineer that I am at heart found it better to put it in tabular form... Please note the table mentioned below is after I have done an Analysis of all the parents 
  • I know around me...
  • From the books...
  • In the movies... 
  • From talking to children...
  • From observing in public places and hospitals...

 

The 20th Century Parent

The 21st Century Parent

  Father Mother Father Mother
Ages 0-1        
Breastfeeding NO YES NO YES
Bottle Feeding  NO YES YES YES
Diaper Changes NO YES YES YES
Baby Shopping NO YES YES YES
Baby Talks NO YES YES YES
Age 2-5        
Potty Training NO YES YES YES
Story Telling  YES YES YES YES
Reading Books NO YES YES YES
Age 6-10        
Creating Independent Child NO YES YES YES
Fundamental Building NO YES YES YES
Age 11-15        
Adolescence Challenges NO YES YES YES
Coping up with uncertainty NO YES YES YES
Creating a Socially Responsible Citizen NO YES YES YES
Age 15+        
Creating a Career Minded Child NO YES YES YES
Being a Child's friend NO YES YES YES
Throughout        
Hygiene care NO YES YES YES
Vaccinations & Appointments NO YES YES YES
Medical Care NO YES YES YES
Lifestyle Care YES NO YES YES
Financial Stability YES NO YES YES
Nutrition Care NO YES YES YES
Communication with the child NO YES YES YES
Disciplining YES NO YES YES
Loving and Care NO YES YES YES
Financial and Physical Support YES NO YES YES
Emotional Support NO YES YES YES
Morals & Values YES YES YES YES
Teaching and grooming YES YES YES YES
School Commitments NO YES YES YES
Attending Performances & Meetings NO YES YES YES
Physical Upbringing NO YES YES YES
Talent growth NO YES YES YES




Even though the percentage of the parents involved in Neutral Parenting is small in comparison to the Traditional Parenting... the percentage is increasing gradually... 

It kind of made me realise that I am fortunate enough to have a partner who practices and encourages Neutral Parenting...

Thursday, June 18, 2015

To Father of My Children Thee

My Husband is one of the most hands-on father I have ever met...

He is very much involved in his daughters...

In fact he heads the Opposition party against me....

He means the world to his daughters...

He always was a good, kind and helping human....

Becoming a father to daughters has only made him better...

He is utmost caring...  very particular about their health...
He would even tell my mom to ensure that she should take utmost care of little ones even though he knew that my mom was the best person to look after my daughters...
My aai and I used to laugh at this and admire his involvement...

Let anyone of them fall sick or be given a vaccination or be taken to hospital...
He shall show how brave he is and let the moment come, he just breaks down....
How much I love him for this....

He should start a coaching class on how to pamper these daughters...

It is like he is the world's best DAD and I'm the world's worst MOM...

He enjoyed bathing them when they were small... played with them for hours.... cooked up stories at run time and entertained them... And does so even now... .

He loves spending time with them... He is the ultimate weapon against me... "Babanni Permission Dili Aahe...."And Poor Mumma has to agree...

How much ever he crib of being fed-up of the continuous blabber and the non-stop chaos in our small den.. How much ever he keep on saying 'How I wish I can get some peace of mind.... '
He cannot stay alone....  forget for days.. even one day is difficult for him...

His support was phenomenal when I was doing my Management Program... The way he took care of the family only a person with a heart can do... 

I am proud of my husband for the Father that he is...

Monday, June 15, 2015

To My Father thee



I have a father who was strict who is loving who is absent minded
He scolded me for wrong things I did
He taught me to Be Prepared all the time
He taught me not to let others make me cry
He gave me ample of comfort but was annoyed when I demanded even a single thing...

For him it was important I respect what I have and work hard to achieve things and not demand easy comfort
But he is the person who spent on my education and comfort so that I do not have to go through hardships...

He always was annoyed when my mother bought 10 dresses for my birthday but pleasantly paid the bill...
He always scolds me when he sits besides me when I drive... But can't hide the happiness in his eyes...

He has attended every function of mine be it  society, school, college or office...
He shall keep on telling me that I need to achieve perfection in every thing I do...
When the world is happy with my small success, he tells me to be grounded and keep it going...

I have seen him act strong but the softest at heart when it comes to me...
He respects people but does not like when they misbehave with me..

I am pride of his eyes and shall always be his little Munnu... Even if I am a mother of two...

Love  you baba for all that you mean to me...

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

A Milestone Achieved - A Dream Come True


  • How often do we dream? 
  • How often you dream to fulfill a dream of a person about a person? 
  • How often a person's dream about you becomes a silent wish of almost all people around you? 
  • How often people support, pray and be there for you to fulfill a person's dream about you?  
  • How often do a clan of people cry with joy on your achievements more than you? 
  • How often the pride in your parents' eyes  for you become an inspiration for your daughter? 
  • How often do you get your children be proud of you for your academic success?
  • How often does your husband proudly say he is proud of you?
  • How often do your teachers say the best things about you?
  • How often you feel being loved to this extent?
This is how you beam with joy when all this happens to you